For most of my life, I have always been “controversial” in my opinions, beliefs, and advocacy. But, I have a confession…I don’t like being controversial. My preference would be to live the “simple life” in quiet and out of the public eye. One of the main reasons is that people scare me, not because I have social anxiety, but the behaviors and words of people are many times more harmful, then they are comforting.
 
Just this morning I awoke to a Facebook comment that told me: “May God have mercy on your soul” (Basically telling me that I am going to Hell). This message was from a “Christian” sister who insists that she does not need help interpreting the Bible, she just needs to read it and believe it. The irony is that both Jesus, the Son of God, and the Apostle Paul state that sacrificial love is the key (Matthew 22:40) and fulfillment to the law (Romans 13:10). And so the condemnation that I received for the purpose of defending the faith, actually ran counter to the core message of the Bible: LOVE.
 
My response to her was, “Thank you for the prayers! May God bless you.”
 
This individual was not the first, and (sigh) she will not be the last. I wish it was so easy to dismiss the criticism and judgments of others, but the truth is—IT HURTS! We all desire to be loved and accepted, and people always come up short on the love and acceptance end.
 
So, do I retreat? Nope. Why? Dietrich Bonhoeffer said it best:

“Jesus Christ lived in the midst of his enemies. At the end all his disciples deserted him. On the Cross he was utterly alone, surrounded by evildoers and mockers. For this cause he had come, to bring peace to the enemies of God. So the Christian, too, belongs not in the seclusion of a cloistered life but in the thick of foes. There is his commission, his work. 'The kingdom is to be in the midst of your enemies. And he who will not suffer this does not want to be of the Kingdom of Christ; he wants to be among friends, to sit among roses and lilies, not with the bad people but the devout people. O you blasphemers and betrayers of Christ! If Christ had done what you are doing who would ever have been spared' (Luther).” From Life Together: The Classic Exploration of Faith in Community
 
The enemies of Jesus were the religious…but He sacrificially loved them and loves us—to the very end. If we are followers of Jesus, then we must follow His example of sacrificial love, even for our enemies.
 
We must also practice self-love because we are to love our neighbors as we love ourselves (Mark 12:30-31). How do we practice self-love? We practice is by basking in the Father’s unconditional love for us!
 
When I am condemned, shunned, criticized, mocked or scorned, I choose to remember that I am never alone and I am loved beyond comprehension. Meditating on these verses help:
 
“31 What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32 He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? 33 Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. 34 Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us.35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? 36 As it is written: “For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.”[j] 37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,[k]neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8)
 
“Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” (Deuteronomy 31:6)
 
“Who are you to condemn someone else's servants? Their own master will judge whether they stand or fall. And with the Lord's help, they will stand and receive his approval.” (Romans 14:4)
 
Psalm 91- Read Here
 
I also turn on some good music that feeds my soul. I really appreciate Matt Maher’s “Your Love Defends Me.”
 
The important thing is to remember that we are not defined by the opinion of others, but only by the Father. The Father loves us with an everlasting love (Jeremiah 31:3) and that we are the apple of His eye (Zechariah 2:8).
 
Always remember, “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love” (1 John 4:18). Trust that God’s love is big enough for you and your enemies.
 
As a final note, allow me to address those who like to shun others in the name of Jesus, the Bible, or your religion: STOP.
 
Jesus, the Word made flesh, says these are the GREATEST commandments:
 “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all    your mind.’ 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is    like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ 40 All the Law and the Prophets hang  on these two commandments.” (Matthew 22:37-40)

Jesus adds to these commandments: “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another” (John 13:34). There is no scholarly debate on these verses!
Further there are no debates on the following that expound upon the themes of love, grace, and redemption in the community:

1. Do not judge, or you will be judged. For with the same judgment you pronounce, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. (Matthew 7:1-2)
2. ‘No,’ he said, ‘if you pull the weeds now, you might uproot the wheat with them. Let both grow together until the harvest. At the proper time I will tell the harvesters, “First collect the weeds and tie them in bundles to be burned; then gather the wheat into my barn.” (Matthew 13:29-30)
3. Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. (1 Peter 4:8)
4. Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Bear with each other and forgive any complaint you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which is the bond of perfect unity. (Colossians 3:12-14)
5. Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. (Galatians 6:2)
6. Don't have anything to do with foolish and stupid arguments, because you know they produce quarrels. (2 Timothy 2:23

 
We can disagree on interpretations of scripture, but we must remember to Major on the Major and Minor on the Minor. As the old saying reminds us: “In Essentials Unity, In Non-Essentials Liberty, In All Things Charity.” Love is the fulfillment of the law (Romans 13:10; Galatians 5:14).
 
THE WORD made FLESH in JESUS said: “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light” (Matthew 11:28-30).
 
And, when the Pharisees attempted to get Jesus to condemn the woman caught in the act of adultery, He said: “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her”… Jesus straightened up and asked her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?” “No one, sir,” she said. “Then neither do I condemn you,” Jesus declared. “Go now and leave your life of sin.” (John 8:1-11).
 
When we stand before the judgment seat of God, I do not think He will ask us “Why did you love too many people?” or “Why did you let so many people in My Church?” Rather, the words of Jesus may echo in the time of judgment when we may hear:
 
“Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You shut the door of the kingdom of heaven in people’s faces. You yourselves do not enter, nor will you let those enter who are trying to… Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You give a tenth of your spices—mint, dill and cumin. But you have neglected the more important matters of the law—justice, mercy and faithfulness. You should have practiced the latter, without neglecting the former. 24 You blind guides! You strain out a gnat but swallow a camel.” (Matthew 23:13, 23-24)
 
God doesn’t want us to pull from His garden of souls, He just wants us to water them with love (Matthew 13:24-30).

My life has been interesting and filled with diversity, to say the least. I grew up between two religious traditions: Judaism and Christianity. My parents were divorced very early in my life, and I now have four parents with four very different families. My career fields in the past decade have spanned: higher education, nonprofit, government service, political campaigning, business, and one day as a substitute teacher (that is a whole other story). I have walked with senators, slept with the homeless, cried with the mourning, and rejoiced with the happy. I have failed more than I have succeeded. It is through this multi-faceted lens that I approach my faith, the scriptures, and our world.

The purpose of this article is to give you a glimpse into my views on faith and society. Frequently, I am asked a question similar to this: "Do you believe that _____ is a sin?" One can fill in the blank with all sorts of vices, but all too frequently the blank is filled with the vice of others, rather than the plank in our own eyes (Matthew 7:5). The question is seldom asked without a prejudice associated with it, whereby we seek to justify our actions (Luke 10:29). We all have a lens through which we approach the world, but we all do not acknowledge it; therefore, we cannot challenge it. The Apostle Paul states that we "see through a glass darkly" (1 Corinthians 13:12). We must understand that we are in the dark before we ever attempt to find the light.

In so many places in society, we have been told: "There are no stupid questions." As an academic who has lectured in front of countless students over the past decade, I can say with certainty that there are stupid questions. More specifically, there are wrong questions for which we might have the right answers. In supervising doctoral students in writing their dissertations, I spend a great deal of time challenging their research questions. One may find it interesting that the hardest part for many doctoral students is not writing the dissertation document, but in formulating good research questions. The questions are more important than the answers, which is a difficult concept for many because we want the right answer, not more questions. We want to get an "A" in a course because we got the right answers, not because we left the class with more questions than answers. We are not comfortable with ambiguity and mystery, and yet these are essential elements to faith.

Wrong questions emerge from opinions, bias, and ignorance. Jesus frequently dealt with wrong questions and He frustrated the one who asked the question by not giving an answer to their question but instead reframing both the question and the answer. Take a look at the Gospels and you can see why the religious leaders hated Him so much. He disputed their established answers by challenging their questions. He demonstrated that God was more interested in challenging the process than He was with the outcome (Hebrews 5:8; 12:2). After all, Jesus knows the outcome because He is author and finisher of our faith (12:2).  

Wrong questions emerge from opinions, bias, and ignorance. Jesus frequently dealt with wrong questions and He frustrated the one who asked the question by not giving an answer to their question but instead reframing both the question and the answer. Take a look at the Gospels and you can see why the religious leaders hated Him so much. He disputed their established answers by challenging their questions. He demonstrated that God was more interested in challenging the process than He was with the outcome (Hebrews 5:8; 12:2). After all, Jesus knows the outcome because He is author and finisher of our faith (12:2).

As a student, frequently I would find myself frustrated with instructors who said that we should not worry about the grade, but focus on the learning. My frustration was rooted in the fact that in this life grades matter! And, if grades did not matter, then why give me a grade at all? The pursuit of a good grade caused both good and bad actions: I studied, and I cheated. After all, I needed a good grade. The focus on the outcome proved detrimental to my learning process.

The biblical law is focused on outcome to demonstrate that we cannot earn a good grade in God’s kingdom. The purpose of the law is described in Romans 5:20: "God's law was given so that all people could see how sinful they were. But as people sinned more and more, God's wonderful grace became more abundant." Jesus takes away the grade, not by dismissing it, but by fulfilling it (Matthew 5:17). “He canceled the record of the charges against us and took it away by nailing it to the cross” (Colossians 2:14). Jesus passed the test, and now we don't have to worry about the wrong questions, but we can focus on the right answer! Jesus is the right answer! God replaces our performance-shamed based worth, with a grace-based value!

Having received my doctorate in 2013 has freed me from having to take tests and answering the questions that some outside authority has imposed upon me to answer. It has been so freeing because it has provided me with the time to challenge my questions. However, as noted above, I am still frequented with the questions of others, which is a challenge, opportunity, privilege, and burden.

People desire the right answers because they are uncomfortable with questions. I understand this desire, and it is found in the pages of scripture. Take for example Exodus 3:13-14: "Moses said to God, “Suppose I go to the Israelites and say to them, ‘The God of your fathers has sent me to you,’ and they ask me, ‘What is his name?’ Then what shall I tell them?” God said to Moses, “I am who I am. This is what you are to say to the Israelites: ‘I am has sent me to you.’” I can imagine that this was not a fulfilling answer to Moses. The reason that the answer was not fulfilling is that it was a bad question rooted in bad motives—Moses was trying to get out of doing what God wanted Him to do because He was scared.

Our motives are the biases that frame our questions. God challenges our motives. Our love for God, neighbors, and enemies should be the motive that fuels our questions (Matthew 22:40) because LOVE is the fulfillment of the law (Romans 13:10). Jesus forewarns: “Because of the increase of wickedness, the love of most will grow cold" (Matthew 24:12). This passage is a warning to the CHURCH, not the world. The word for love in the Greek used here is AGAPE. According to Gotquestions.org: "The essence of agape love is goodwill, benevolence, and willful delight in the object of love. Unlike our English word love, agape is not used in the New Testament to refer to romantic or sexual love. Nor does it refer to close friendship or brotherly love, for which the Greek word philia is used. Agape love involves faithfulness, commitment, and an act of the will. It is distinguished from the other types of love by its lofty moral nature and strong character. Agape love is beautifully described in 1 Corinthians 13.”

Agape love comes from God and belongs to the children of God, but Jesus tells us that it will grow cold in the latter days. As our love grows cold, so our questions emerge not from a sincere desire to learn but to win by justifying ourselves and attempting to earn a grade in Heaven that we could never earn. The more I study, the more I am reminded of how much I do not know or could comprehend. As we study His Word (2 Timothy 2:15), we should come to appreciate the incredible beauty of Grace, the foolishness of humankind, and the wisdom of God. I think it is time to put simple questions and arguments aside: "When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me” (1 Corinthians 13:11).
​
Trust that God is more than capable of handling the arguments of our day. In the meantime, individually and collectively we should “continue to work out [our own] salvation with fear and trembling” (Philippians 2:12). And we must remember this one, unalterable truth: “Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners--of whom I am the worst” (1 Timothy 1:15). Drop the stones and run to the cross!
 

It was two years ago today, June 12, 2016, that our nation witnessed a mass-killing at the Pulse Nightclub in Orlando, Florida with 49 people killed and 53 others wounded. I was sickened by this news, but I also felt disheartened by the apathy and indifference of the majority of the American Christian church. 

(Note: Part of what is written in this blog was from writings of mine during that time period.)

“People are suffering, and God’s people need to be there with them, loving them, and standing in the gap for them,” I thought. Wherever people are suffering, God’s people are called to stand by their side—in prayer and sacrificial loving actions.

After the Orlando shooting in the Pulse nightclub, there were statements found in newspaper articles and op-eds that referred to the nightclub as a form of “church” for the LGBT community. It was a form of 'church' because it offered this community a respite and safe harbor to be themselves. One particularly meaningful quote was by a gay man who regularly went to Pulse:

“While a lot of people turn to churches, LGBT communities are often forced to use nightclubs as our safe haven, and Pulse was mine. Although I had built armor to defend myself from the hatred that was spewed to me when I came out (including some from my own mother), the reality was that I still hated myself because of my identity as a gay man. It didn’t help that I had grown up in a church that had conditioned me to hate myself for loving other men.”

These sentiments are reflected in countless stories, and they cause me grief over my silence and lament for the Church that I love. The Church is supposed to be the place for everyone to hear the Good News, but sadly, it has turned many away because the love of most has grown cold. 

Unfortunately, I have encountered, witnessed, and experienced similar stories. One statement I heard from a gay man, who has a great heart and loves God, was: “I would go to church, but I am not welcomed there.” While I found this disturbing, I also have to say that it is true.

As I continued my reflection of this tragedy in my time with God, I have felt a burning in my heart to speak up for the LGBTQ community and to challenge the assumptions, interpretations, and prejudices that have polluted our message. 

For a while, I attempted to remain silent, preferring the status quo “peace” then to thrust myself into the fray. After all, I have personally witnessed the “bible slamming” that happens when someone speaks up from within the Christian community. However, the Pulse nightclub tragedy was a turning point in my life. 

How could I remain silent? The Anglican Bishop Desmond Tutu wrote, “If you are neutral in situations of injustice, you have chosen the side of the oppressor. If an elephant has its foot on the tail of a mouse and you say that you are neutral, the mouse will not appreciate your neutrality.”

As I continued to pray in the aftermath of the Pulse nightclub tragedy, I was led to the story of Esther, who was a Jewish queen of the Persian king Ahasuerus. She was out of place and living between two different worlds—of the Jews and the Persians. Her uncle Mordecai informed Esther of a decree that would exterminate the Jews. Esther was reluctant to speak because of her fear of the King, but Mordecai replied to her:

“Do not think to yourself that in the king's palace you will escape any more than all the other Jews. For if you keep silent at this time, relief and deliverance will rise for the Jews from another place, but you and your father's house will perish. And who knows whether you have not come to the kingdom for such a time as this?” (4:13-14). 

I believe I was led to this passage because it was time for me to speak ”for such a time as this.” If I did not speak, then I am complicit in shutting the “door of the kingdom of heaven in people's faces” (Matthew 23:13).

The church is quick to recite John 3:16, but neglects to understand the fantastic teaching found in the next verse: “For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.” This verse is further illuminated in John 12:32 when Jesus says: “And I when I am lifted up from the earth, will draw all people to myself.” Notice that the message of God’s son is not condemnation, but acceptance for everyone! The Church, which bears the name of Christ, must share in dispensing the incredible grace and unconditional love that He demonstrated in His life, teachings, and death.

In our acceptance of everyone, including the LGBTQI community, we must work together to strive toward holiness. We must remember that holiness is not made possible by works, but by faith alone (Romans 3:28-30). Paul states in Ephesians 2:8, “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith--and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God.” 

Our faith calls us to accept His grace, which then unleashes the creative and regeneration works of the Holy Spirit in making us a new creation in Christ Jesus (2 Corinthians 5:17). If Jesus is the author and finisher of our faith (Hebrews 12:2), then should we not trust Him, not only for ourselves but also for others, to finish that which He has started (Philippians 1:6)?

If we ere, let us always do so in being too loving and too gracious. I have never read a story in the Bible where anyone was condemned by God for loving or sharing too much.

Since that terrible day on June 12, 2016, I have come to trust more and more in God's amazing grace, not just for me, but for everyone! I have come to understand that there are many more questions then answers on this side of eternity. But, I am comforted in knowing that God is big enough to handle them all and His love is strong enough to calm us in the midst of the unknown. As the old song goes, "My hope is built on nothing less Than Jesus Christ, my righteousness; I dare not trust the sweetest frame, But wholly lean on Jesus’ name."

We must remember these wise words: “In essentials, unity; in nonessentials, liberty; in all things, love.”

David fastened on his sword over the tunic and tried walking around, because he was not used to them. "I cannot go in these," he said to Saul, "because I am not used to them." So he took them off. – 1 Samuel 17:39

Growing up and even today, I always appreciate the story of the young David, before he became king. The youngest of his siblings, David wasn’t even considered by his father, Jesse, as one who might be anointed king over Israel. Indeed, the prophet Samuel when looking at the other brothers was initially inclined to anoint one who seemed like the natural fit, but God had other intentions. In 1 Samuel 16:7 we read, “But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” And so, Samuel asks Jesse if there is another son and he summons David who is anointed King.

One of the greatest lessons that I have learned about God through the process of accepting myself, with all of my paradoxes, is how God's grace is so AMAZING. Just as God did with David, so he does with each of us—He looks at our hearts, our character, and our truest selves. In speaking to the prophet Jeremiah, God says: "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations” (Jeremiah 1:5). God knows us, loves us, and has a plan for us. Learning to accept this profound reality is essential in understanding who we truly are. It also requires us to unlearn what we have thought about ourselves for so long.

A sociologist name Charles Cooley formulated the concept of the “looking glass self.” In layman’s terms, it basically posits that our identity is shaped by what we think the most important person(s) in our lives think about us. Throughout our lives, we have many important people: parents, family, and friends. Also, sometimes we make people important, who really are not in the long run. Nonetheless, our thoughts and feelings about the perception of others about ourselves shape how we see ourselves and ultimately who we become. Proverbs 23:7 (KJV) states, “For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he.” Unfortunately, our thinking is not always our own and is not shaped by the one who truly matters—God. We take on the perceptions of others and call it 'truth', without ever examining whether it is the right fit, or truth, for us.

In 1 Samuel 17, we see that the Israelites are being tormented by Goliath. Day and night he is demeaning them and they begin to see themselves as he calls it. They buy into the deception and they are afraid. In verse 16, David enters on to the scene
and cannot believe what he is seeing and hearing, not from Goliath, but from his fellow Israelites. And so, David steps forward to take on Goliath. David was armed with a God-given identity and the assurance that came with it, but immediately his fellow countrymen tried to dissuade him from going out to challenge Goliath. Then in verses 38-39, King Saul gets David to put on his personal armor, but it did not fit David. Instead, he went out dressed like the shepherd boy that he was and brought down Goliath with five smooth stones.

David knew who he was because it was just confirmed by the prophet one chapter earlier. He had a God-given identity and because of that he knew what fit him and what did not. He did not succumb to the temptation to fit in with the others, rather he embraced his uniqueness and shed the hand-me-down armor of those were too afraid to fight for themselves. Of course, David had to ultimately wait for 20 years before finally becoming king of Israel. Perhaps this was necessary to truly learn his God-given identity and to embrace it, so that he would truly be “a man after God’s own heart” (Acts 13:22).

How many times are we like David with others trying to impose their identities upon us? How many time are we unlike David and willingly accept those identities because we want to fit in or it is simply easier? For so many years, my identity was based on trying to make other people happy and it came at a great expense because it didn’t make any of us happy. Most people are uncomfortable in their own “armor” to even think about your “armor.” As I tell people often, no one is thinking about you as often as you are thinking about yourself.

The LORD God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it. 16 And the LORD God commanded the man, “You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; 17 but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die.”- Genesis 2

Have you ever wondered why a sovereign, all-knowing God would deliberately put a tree in the garden which was off limits to His children? If God knows everything, then He knew that Adam and Eve would eat of the tree that He said was off limits. The reason that God placed the tree in the garden is that He wanted Adam and Eve to CHOOSE to love Him through their obedience. 1 John 5:3 tells us that love for God is expressed in our obedience to Him. God did not want us to be robots to be programmed to love Him, rather He gave us a will to choose to love Him, but this means that there is also the choice NOT to love Him. In the beginning of all creation, God is already instructing His children about love.

1 John 4:8 tells us that God IS love. Love is not just something God does, it is who He is and by knowing Him better—we learn to truly love better. As we learn from our Creator, love requires vulnerability and by placing the tree in the garden, He gave Adam and Eve the opportunity to hurt Him through their disobedience or to love Him through their obedience. What transpires is that they disobeyed God and hurt Him—just as we continue to do so today. However, God has not changed in His way of making Himself vulnerable.

God’s vulnerability is ultimately seen in Jesus. Jesus made Himself nothing (Philippians 2) and took on the nature of a servant. He came to love us and show us the way and rather than revering Him and giving Him the glory He deserved—we crucified Him. Again, this was no surprise to God and He still chose to make Himself vulnerable because God knew that love would overcome the odds—even death itself! It is that amazing love that continues to transform the world and the hearts of men and women.

Here is a movie scene from "Somethings Gotta Give"

In Ephesians 4:31, Paul writes: “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.” In this month’s newsletter article, I want to focus on the danger of a bitter heart. The Bible outlines an array of difficulties that emerge in our walk with the Lord and with others as a result of a bitter heart. Proverbs 4:23 states, “Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.” This scripture reminds us that the state of our hearts will determine the quality of our lives. So, with that in mind let us examine how bitterness affects our hearts and lives.
 
Bitterness develops when we allow anger and hurt to fester in our lives. Ephesians 4:26 tells us that we should not “let the sun go down while you are still angry” because it gives the devil the ability to take an offense and make our hearts bitter. The longer we let an offense dwell within us, the more bitter our hearts will become—and the more devastating the consequence. This is why Proverbs 17:9 states, “He who covers an offense promotes love, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends.” If we do not let go of the anger, we end up repeating the offense over and over in our minds, which in turn makes our hearts bitter and makes all of our relationships suffer.
 
When our hearts are full of bitterness, our minds are filled with confusion, our words are full of gossip (Psalm 64:3)/slander (Heb. 12:15)/complaining (Job 7:11), and sinful actions (Job 21:25). Jeremiah 2:19 tells us that bitterness is an indication of a fragmented life in both our relationship to God and our relationship to others. Proverbs 14:10 states, “Each heart knows its own bitterness, and no one else can fully share its joy” (NLT), which means that we are alienated from genuine relationships because no one wants to be around you! At the end of the day, bitterness leads to misery for you and misery for those who surround you.
 
So, how do you deal with bitterness in your life? Well, consider the principle: if you don’t feed something, it will die. In keeping with this principle, stop feeding your heart with evil thoughts (Matthew 9:4) and anger and bitterness will die. Most people are surprised by this statement, but it is your choice to be bitter or to be better. Paul says in Ephesians 4:32 that instead of being bitter you should “be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.” If you allow someone’s offense to take hold in your life—you give him or her power and the devil a foothold. However, when you choose to do what God tells us to do, it keeps the dysfunction of your offender from becoming your dysfunction and the devil has to flee from you (James 4:7). Turn every offense into a prayer—every persecution into a praise—every test into a testimony—and you will enjoy the peace that surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7).
 
Lastly, how do you deal with those who have bitter hearts? First, pray for them (Luke 6:27-28). When you pray for them it accesses God’s amazing power to change hearts and it guards your own heart from becoming bitter (bitterness is contagious). Second, love them. No one likes being around bitter people, but Jesus tells us that it is the sick that need a doctor (Matthew 9:12) and when you love them it can plant a seed for repentance (Romans 12:20). Third, “speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs” (Ephesians 5:19)…in other words, make sure your words build up and not tear down (Ephesians 4:29). Lastly, always remember that God “has called us to live in peace” (1 Cor. 7:15) so guard your own heart (Proverbs 4:23) and don’t let their dysfunction become your own. 

Recently, I got into a debate with a colleague of mine at the University about the use of textbooks in courses and their effectiveness in learning material. She argued that we always had textbooks and we should continue to use them. My argument is that technological advances have given us new tools to advance learning that are more effective and cheaper. (Further, I always hate using the past to justify decisions, rather than looking at the facts that are in the present.) For my colleague, a textbook presented a comfort—a one-stop shop to get the information. For me, a textbook, while at times may be necessary, actually hinders learning and growth because we are not in the book to learn, but to get the “right answer,” so that we can pass the test. Learning, in my opinion, happens best when we are seeking knowledge with the right motivation.
I hated math class in school. It was always a struggle for me, and so, to pass my courses I cheated. I cheated in middle school all the way through high school. In fact, my cheating was creative with just the right amount of errors to avoid getting caught. And, because I was the “good Christian” boy, my teachers had no clue. But, then I went to college and had to take a math class that I could not cheat in (after all, I knew better. An 87-year-old professor named Mr. Zampetti taught the math class and he was the best math teacher I have ever had. For the first time I was not intimidated by the questions because he taught in a new style—one that did not rely on getting the right answers, but learning the right process! He said in the beginning of the course, "Let me tell you something there is never going to be a place in your life where you won't have a text book…unless you're going to be an astronaut.” Because the course was basic college math, he then added: “And, if you’re going to be an astronaut—good luck because this is remedial math!” His philosophy was simple: focus less on the right answers and focus more on the right process! Use the textbook to guide you in the process of finding the right answers.
In our lives, we always want the right answers to the questions we face, when God is more concerned with the process through which we seek out the answers. We cannot rely on someone else doing the work for us in getting the answers; rather we must learn to work out our salvation with fear and trembling (Philippians 2:12). In 2 Timothy 3:15-17, Paul instructs young Timothy to: "Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly handles the word of truth. All scripture is inspired by God and is useful for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, so that everyone who belongs to God may be proficient, equipped and ready for every good work."  God’s desire is that we would be students on the scriptures as we seek His truth through the power of the Holy Spirit as we walk with the WORD made flesh: Jesus. Jesus is the LIVING WORD (John 1:1-18) and the purpose of scripture to point us to Him in all of our human reasoning. We are to read the scriptures for the purpose of seeking after God (Jeremiah 29:13), not answers to questions (James 4:3). Our study must engage our brains (Isaiah 1:18), our hearts (Proverbs 8:17), our spirits (John 4:24), and ultimately our love for God and for one another (Mark 12:30-31).
Scripture is an inspired tool of the Holy Spirit to transform us into the likeness of Jesus Christ. However, if we do not understand this motivation behind the text, we will be fooled into thinking that scriptures are about finding answers, rather than changing our process. In Matthew 5:17 (Message translation), Jesus states: "Don’t suppose for a minute that I have come to demolish the Scriptures—either God’s Law or the Prophets. I’m not here to demolish but to complete. I am going to put it all together, pull it all together in a vast panorama.” The law was given as a temporary guide until we received Christ and the power of the Holy Spirit. Paul eloquently sums it up in Galatians 3:24 (NLT): “Let me put it another way. The law was our guardian until Christ came; it protected us until we could be made right with God through faith.” Now that followers of Jesus have the guidance of the Holy Spirit, God wants to reveal to us a new, greater revelation of truth. John 16:12-13 (AMP) tells us about God's Holy Spirit. We get God's spirit, Jesus says, “I have many more things to say to you, but you cannot bear [to hear] them now. 13 But when He, the Spirit of Truth, comes, He will guide you into all the truth [full and complete truth]. For He will not speak on His own initiative, but He will speak whatever He hears [from the Father—the message regarding the Son], and He will disclose to you what is to come [in the future]. The Holy Spirit is still at work guiding us into all truth!
The right motivation coupled with the right process, under the guidance of the right teacher, brings about the right meaning! Following Jesus is not hard when we understand is really in control and we allow Him to control our lives. The scriptures are inspired to help us work out the agape love of God in our lives as “love is the fulfillment of the law” (Romans 13:10). The best way for this to happen to allow Jesus, the manifestation of God’s perfect love, to teach us His ways by truly experiencing and dispensing the agape love of Christ.
​The Apostle Paul’s prayer for the Ephesian church was not that there theology be perfect, but that their revelation of God’s love would grow. In Ephesians 3:14-19 (Message), we read: “My response is to get down on my knees before the Father, this magnificent Father who parcels out all heaven and earth. I ask him to strengthen you by his Spirit—not a brute strength but a glorious inner strength—that Christ will live in you as you open the door and invite him in. And I ask him that with both feet planted firmly on love, you’ll be able to take in with all followers of Jesus the extravagant dimensions of Christ’s love. Reach out and experience the breadth! Test its length! Plumb the depths! Rise to the heights! Live full lives, full in the fullness of God.” And this is my prayer for all of us! 

About two months ago, I went to my annual eye exam and was told that my vision required the use of bifocals. I found this to be an odd diagnosis because while my eyes were tired after reading, for the most part, I could see quite well. However, I went to an “expert,” and I figured he knew better than I. After I got my new glasses, however, I could not see as clearly as I could without wearing glasses. When I told people of this problem, they replied that I just needed to get used to them. So, I gave it about another week before going back to the eye doctor with my complaints. When I went back to him, I got a new eye exam, and he told me that he gave me the wrong prescription and that I did NOT need bifocals. I was both relieved and frustrated. I was relieved because it confirmed what I knew, and frustrated because it was costly for time and resources.
In reflecting over this experience, I cannot help to think that this is the process by which many of us develop our theology. The dictionary defines “theology” as the “study of the nature of God and religious belief.” Most of the time we are given a theology, like a prescription, by an “expert.” The experts that we rely upon are our family, clergy, media, etc. However, we rely on their expertise in helping us sort out our theology. Once we get our prescribed theology, we may not be comfortable with questioning the diagnosis. However, the prescribed theology is just like a pair of glasses, in that it can enhance or distort our view of the world. We are ultimately responsible to question and seek the right diagnosis, especially if we notice that there is not a good fit, regardless of our how others may want us to just accept it.
In thinking about my religious upbringing, I was not taught or encouraged to question matters of faith. It shouldn’t surprise you that I remember my pastor getting frustrated with me when I started questioning him in youth group. He replied to my questions that I was just “being difficult.” However, I did have questions that were not being answered. I was told to take the glasses of others and put them on to perceive matters of faith—and it just did not fit! Perhaps it their “theological glasses” fit for them, but it did not fit for me. I had questions and continue to have questions concerning theology, but I have learned that I must challenge the lenses I have been given to understand theological matters—because the lens might not fit. In Philippians 2:12, Paul instructs us to “continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling.”
Theological matters are works in progress that requires us to work at seeing things clearer. It is always alarming to me when people are so confident in theological matters, especially given what Paul says in 1 Corinthians 13:12 (AMP): For now [in this time of imperfection] we see in a mirror dimly [a blurred reflection, a riddle, an enigma], but then [when the time of perfection comes we will see reality] face to face. Now I know in part [just in fragments], but then I will know fully, just as I have been fully known [by God]. We are in the process of receiving progressive revelations of God’s truth and we do not see it clearly at first. It takes time to see it clearly and the only way for it to happen is for us to get closer to Jesus, who is our light and our truth. Jesus illuminates the meaning of the scripture that shapes our theology.
In Mark 8:22-25, we read about Jesus healing a blind man at Bethsaida. Jesus heals him, but the change in his vision takes time. After Jesus spits in the man’s eyes and put’s his hands on him, the man opens his eyes and sees, but not clearly. Jesus lays his hands on his eyes again and it says, “Then his eyes were opened, his sight was restored, and he saw everything clearly.” The man could have been content with being able to see distortions, after all this was better than being blind; however, he went back to the great physician to see clearly! Think about the stages we see in the passage: before Jesus the man was blind, the first healing restored sight, and the last healing truly opened his eyes! I can’t help but to think how we are like the blind man and how many of us are walking around with distorted vision, distorted theology, because we think we are seeing clearly because an expert told us that this is how it is. But what if we have the wrong lenses through which we are viewing God and His leading.
The Pharisees had the wrong lens and it resulted in them missing out on embracing Jesus. He states in John 5:39, “You study the Scriptures diligently because you think that in them you have eternal life. These are the very Scriptures that testify about me.” In other words, the only way to read the scriptures is through the lenses of Jesus.
​One final note about lenses and theology. Most of us should go for an eye exam every year because our vision changes as we get older. The old glasses don’t work as well as they used to and we need an adjustment in our lenses. Likewise, matters of faith will change as we get older. Paul writes in 1 Corinthians 13:11, “When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me.” It is good and healthy to challenge the lenses through which we perceive theological matters, as well as matters of the world. One of the things that I appreciate about international travel is to see the world through a different cultures perspective. I enjoy dialoguing with those of other faith perspectives because I value the opportunity for an “I” exam, as my beliefs, assumptions, and attitudes are challenged. I value my religious upbringing; I just wish they encouraged me to challenge “my vision” by openly questioning “their vision.” May we be a community that invites questions and embraces the mystery of faith. While we look at things through different lenses, we, like Paul, resolve to know only one thing with certainty--Jesus Christ and His crucifixion for us (1 Corinthians 2:2).